Uphill Battle

So, I want to run. I have always hated running, and loved the idea of running. I watched enviously as runners deftly sped past me on trails, sidewalks, campuses... They never seemed to be experiencing any stress, shortness of breath, muscle fatigue, or anything. How long have these people been running? Did they just run right out of the womb?

In gym class I watched the tiny preppy girls lap me. They would complete the dreaded mile run in 6 minutes or less. I lagged behind, wheezing, clocking in at 11, 12, 13 minutes. My muscles ached, and I felt some sadistic chef had drug a cheese grater down my esophagus and through my lungs. I hated those girls and their bouncy ponytails.

I think it's important to add here, though no offense is meant, that I am not, nor have I ever been, overweight. People don't realize that overweight and out of shape do not always go hand in hand. Just as there are "overweight" people who eat healthily and exercise, there are also "normal weight" or "underweight" people who just generally suck at all things physically strenuous.

I'm raising my hand. I'm one of them. I'm very nearly 5'6" and at my heaviest was probably 136 pounds. I am now about 127. I'm not trying to lose weight by running. I'm just trying not to lose my breath running for the bus. I want to be a runner.

I want to speed past bewildered citizens on the trails of Bellingham! I want to have the coveted runner's legs. I want them. I have skinny calves. I have friends who complain they can't wear those hot knee-high fall boots because their calves are too big. Well, they don't fit me either. They make me look like Spinelli from Recess.

I would really like to see her with her shoes off. What are those, size 15 mens?

So my fiance and I have started the journey small. Three times now we have run about 2 blocks uphill. It takes us ten minutes round-trip and we get the cheese grater-on-lungs effect hardcore. My leg muscles feel like they're going to burst through my skin, Alien-style. I feel like the weakest person, huffing and puffing, skin still warm from having just left the house. But it must be working, because today we ran flat on a trail for about 1.5 miles. And I wasn't winded. Such a feat has NEVER happened to me. Ever. I have the endurance of American Apparel underwear. (Which is to say, none. I bought a pair once and the elastic came out of the stitching on the first wash. Just stay away.)

I give you my humble introduction into my silly little venture. I want to be a runner, just to see if I can. So here's my dorky unflattering "before" pictures. I should have some of my legs probably, too. But this post is long enough already.

Oh yeah. No sucking in the gut here. Sexy.

I'm a sadface because I'm still a wuss.